Rekindling Goals

Life happens in the small moments; when you least expect or notice the impact.  

Since being ill over the winter, I have had issues with low energy.  Able to get through the day but not much more.   Some days I was annoyed with myself for not being capable of what I was able to do without much thought even last year.  

Tromping through the park by the house has been wonderful but requires significant rest if I became too exuberant or overdo things.  The elevation changes and cool surroundings from the shade of the forest are wonderful on a hot day and seem to beckon just a little bit further.  

I had to learn to listen to myself and my body when I was unable to do more.  Changing techniques to adapt, I took note of what was working and what needed to be modified.  

Small steps toward bigger goals  

Being more regimented with food and sleep has helped immensely.  No more than 4 hours between eating even if it is something light and at least 7, usually 8, hours of sleep each night have helped to stack the energy deck in my favor.  

Changing my rhythm to a series of shorter walks in the neighborhood was something I could do even on lower energy days, though nowhere near what I wanted to do.   

Run like I used to.  

In my mind’s eye, I could feel my feet strong and certain in their pace, gait unwavering arms swinging efficiently without loss of form.  I could feel my breathing deliberate and easy – changing the focus of my mind away from aches and pains toward power and intent with each breath. 

The restorer has become a steady source of support, in discussions he had expressed concern in my desire to run again indicating he would like to be by my side when I attempt.  Walking and riding a bike he is comfortable doing – running is my thing, not his.  

Pacing out my energy had become second nature over the past few months and getting ready for Oshkosh as we both knew would be more physical with walking everywhere at the airport easier than catching a ride.  

Afternoon naps were more necessary than I cared to admit and happened throughout the week at the air show.   

Falling back into nutrition and electrolyte management from marathon training, I used my favorite bars and hydration supplements to help us both through the heat, poor air quality, and humidity of the week. 

Sending tubes of Nuun along with the restorers as they judged aircraft, they indicated it was easier for them to deal with the elements than it could have been.  

Taking time to do things and pace out energy is certainly more of an issue in heat and humidity.  When exerting energy, the body acts as if the surrounding temperature is fifteen degrees warmer than it actually is.  Running with a long-sleeved shirt is often all that is needed down to 40 degrees but in the summer, it is necessary to wear less to prevent overheating.  

The time since returning from Airventure Oshkosh has been spent getting life back to normal and the house reorganized to accommodate both of us.  

I have been feeling stronger most of the time but more able to ask for help when I am tired than before all this.  Getting a task or two done each day felt like a win; my writing has been a priority regardless of my energy level.      

Rising before the sun to listen to the world wake up along with my own thoughts has been something I have done since my early morning shifts at O’Hare.  Having the moments to wake up slowly and listen to my needs has been self-care I didn’t even realize I was doing.  The slow moments of waking up with coffee are more than just caffeine loading. 

This morning, I knew it was time.   

After finishing my coffee, I could hear the restorer awake upstairs and changed into running clothes that I had never worn before – gifts from friends became hugs and encouragement as I prepared to head out.  

Knocking on the bathroom door, I told the restorer it was time which he responded with a sigh saying he will be ready in a moment.   Pulling my hair back to put on a running hat and sunglasses then got hydration ready for both of us, feeling confident in my thoughts and goal for the morning.   

My watch was nowhere near ready to go as it would be a different type of run than I had done before.   

Shoes on and out the door for both of us, the restorer said ‘well, go….’ With both concern and encouragement.  

I started to record my run on the watch and set off slowly with the restorer walking behind.  

My feet moved with muscle memory down the road, slower than before but feeling strong and deliberate remembering the fable of the tortoise and the hare and targeting a consistent pace overall.   Taking a breath at the top of the hill adjacent to our neighborhood, I turned back to see the restorer a block behind me water bottle in hand and plugging along. 

As he got to where I was, I began another push to move on.  

Not very far as things go, just to the bridge on the way to the park at the bottom of the hill.  

I hadn’t given any thought to how far I had intended to go exactly – my ego said a 5k should be no issue, but another part realized it would likely be too far for both of us today.  

A mile will do.  That is enough to give a starting point for things.   

Taking another sip of electrolytes, I set off toward my turnaround point at the bridge.   

My arms and posture felt like it had been days since my last run instead of as long as it had been.  The rhythm of feet hitting the pavement was consistent though slower than I would have liked.  

The bridge came into my view with no issue to either energy or body.   

This was a doable distance.  

Seeing my physical turn around on the other side of the bridge, I kept going without stopping turning my gaze to where the restorer was on the path and aiming for him next.  

My watch beeped a couple of times to indicate run and walk breaks from past intervals which I barely heard.  Happy to see a pace above 15 minutes per mile, I felt like anything was a win today.  

Reaching the restorer, I gave him a hug and thanked him.  With a puzzled look on his face, he asked what he did – I smiled and told him he gave me the safety net I needed to try.  

The restorer turned back towards our house walking while I returned to my jog just a little bit ahead of him.  

By the time we got home, it had been just over fifteen minutes and only a mile.  That was enough to prove to me I can do this though more naps will likely be necessary.  

The only comment the restorer made after returning home was its time to get the bike up and running so he can be right beside me.  

Wow – guess life isn’t always meant to be solo.